Turning Point and Thank Yous

Since Tom left I have been very fortunate to be able to go to Rockport twice. Once in December and once in March/April. It was wonderful to be embraced by my family during this very sad time and although everyone professes support, and I believe them, I think they are also wondering why I cannot move on - though I know they know it is hard and takes time. My immediate family here in California comprehends a little better because they are living with the same pain and shock. Thank you to all of my family members and my best friend/stepsister, Phoebe, for letting me cling to them when I needed to. And to my friends. No one (except Tom, of course) has let me down and that has been invaluable.

The real problem is that I had thirty one years with someone I liked, loved and respected - though the respect has been receding. That he did not feel the same about me ultimately did not change that and that has been a really, really hard thing to get integrated into my current reality, and will still take some time. However, I think that now, more than six months later, I am ready to move on and let go and Tom does what he does and I manage to breath every day and get dressed most days and even laugh occasionally. I have called the end before - sort of like calling the bottom on the stock market, and do expect setbacks, but think I have turned a corner. Whether this should be fodder for this blog I do not know, but I am queen of my own space so here it is. There are still plenty of issues to tackle, but that would need to be done anyway.

4-25-09 *Update* - Two steps back again today. Oh well, so much for the corner turned.

I have added some additional pictures I took in Rockport/Salem. In June we will be having a family reunion. Hopefully the gray in Rockport will be gone and the gray that has dominated the last 6 months will be gone, too. Here's hoping.

A tired Patrick and Danny around 11; right before I called Chris for his address.
Sorry about that - thought it was 9pm.

A throwaway painting that a fellow student saved for Lisa -
I have tried to duplicate it and failed.

The Cinnamon

One of my challenges was setting the camera to the right settings for indoor low light without creating a lot of blur. I still have not mastered it, obviously.

Portrait of some artists as a young man and an old lady.

On the balcony outside the red room. Can you tell it's spring? Me neither.

From the headlands while walking home from the train station.

The old cemetery by Front Beach - the 'Hannah Jumper' cemetery - had a lot of
stories to tell. Mainly that young mothers often died within days of their newborns and
if you lived past 22, a lot of times you survived into your eighties.

Front Beach

There were never such devoted sisters.
And yes, Beth does look exactly like she did 30 years ago.
Paring, paring, every vegetable they are preparing....